childhood
This period of my life is basically gone due to amnesia caused by either ptsd after navy or after Nancy or because after navy I drank much and then did many drugs. my memories are few , there was a bird that was shot by accident as a young person with a bb gun , the bird fell and we all felt bad ,I think I was the trigger person, another memory was when I tried to make a soldering gun , the sparks flew in an impressive manner and the house fuses blew .in 6th grade I had a crayon stuck up my nose and had to go to the nurse to get it out , all that I remember of that event is a white wall and a feeling of being less than human and alone.  I remember spaghetti running down a wall and of being forced to eat something that was repulsive to me. later on it became known to me that my taste and smell senses are more sensitive than normal..       I remember being in the back of a car with cloth seats common to 50’s era cars . we were at Burt lake , it was Sally’s 7th birthday and I would have been 14 in 2 weeks. the sky was blue and the lake a little deeper blue , Sally was wearing a white dress with lacy collar.      around 16 I have memories of cars and friends Ron and Al  as well as a friend across the street Al also . with Al , a short West Virginia person I learned about coffee and how to defend myself . Al was small enough to become a jockey and becoming one of the best in the country. he wanted me to go with him and be a stable boy but I liked playing with electricity and chemicals to much to play with horses ., he went and became famous . Because Al was small he was teased a lot and learned how to fight back , he would not accept any belittling and I too learned how to not be mocked, in the navy that bit of knowledge came in handy , main point is that you stand up and challenge bullies.   my siblings never accepted the fact that I do not remember childhood . I do feel as if I was mean to my brother     I have been told that I caught the back of the garage on fire playing with chemistry. and that is my childhood basically alone and playing with atoms in various forms such as the electron and quark    I  skipped school very much but I went in and took the tests  as a result even though I was passing all the tests I failed the 9th grade twice on attendance . despite the failure I was advanced to the 10th grade in East Detroit High school. did not go much and quit shortly after and joined the navy. later I took a G.E.D. test that took 3 hours  instead of 3 years.